Jigs Brown Remembers...

Mickey. I used to play euchre with Mickey and William Demarest on the lot at Fox and he would never shut the fuck up about all the tail he was getting. Ava Gardner. Mickey Rooney was married to Ava Gardner. That tells you everything you need to know about this world we live in. Ava Gardner, he'd say, tastes just like Sweet Potato Pie. Then he'd talk about how Olivier called him the greatest American actor and we'd say you know, Mick, he was being sarcastic. Olivier is the kinda guy who won't let anybody near a stage whose half as good as him. He'd never give a straight compliment, there's always gotta be a little poison in it.

Lousy partner Mickey was. He'd go alone and end up with two tricks. Mick, I'd say, what the Hell'd you go alone for? He'd say he thought he could make it.

He thought he was pretty hot molasses in those days but boy the world sure beat him back down to size, didn't it? He hasn't made a picture worth a hoot in 20 years. If he ever did.

Ugly man. Short. Bulbous. Just goes to show you in this business you never know whose got the dream stuff. Lotta great looking, talented people never make it outta the background and here's Mickey, little turd with stringy hair, a marquee name. It's a mysterious business.